Has it really been ten days since I last posted something? That doesn't seem possible. We've been on a roller coaster - some good things, some bad - nothing consistent. I think I went back to work too soon. DD has been having a harder time since she started going to preschool full days. I think she misses me, although she clearly likes her school and her teachers clearly like her.
The second day I dropped her off for a full day, the teacher stopped me and told me that she had seen DD's diagnosis and that she wanted to tell me that her daughter also has bipolar disorder. She said that she'd be happy to talk to me anytime. I haven't followed up with her yet, mostly because I'm just barely hanging on, but I intend to get her phone number. It's funny that I was worried about sending her to a school that's far away from our home (it's in the next town), but it turns out that all the time we have driving back and forth isn't so bad. She isn't talking to me as much as she was when we had more time together, which reinforces my thinking that I went back to work too soon, but I also know that once I have her brother settled at his new daycare, I will have more time for her and we can get back into a better routine for her.
We are finding ways of helping her more at home, even though things are still pretty rough with her. We've started taking her out for a walk or a bike ride after dinner. She gets exercise, fresh air, and some undivided attention, although when she comes home to head off to bed she's not always easy to deal with. I wonder if she's overtired? She gets this burst of energy right after dinner and I figure it's better for her to get rid of it outside where she can run around instead of inside where she beats on us and the cat.
The good news? I sent in a request for assessment to the school district and I got two phone calls back - one from the head of special services and one from DD's school psychologist. I got to talk to the psychologist for at least twenty minutes today - she was so great! She totally listened and told me how glad she was that we were letting the school know about the bipolar diagnosis right away and that they would begin the assessment process after school starts in August. Then, I went to meet with her principal, who is FABULOUS! She wants to set up a meeting before school starts with DD's teacher and us so that DD can meet her teacher and so that we can talk to the teacher and let her know what our concerns are. Then, she asks if she can give me a hug to welcome me to the school family! OMG - she is so awesome!
I'm hoping to get some sleep tonight, because I can't remember the last time I slept a whole night. DS has been teething (he's 2 1/2) and super cranky because his lovely home daycare is closing (she's moving because her husband was transferred) and because his sister has been so difficult. If I don't start getting more sleep, I think I'm just going to have to break down and get started on anti-anxiety meds. I am already an anxious person, but now I just can't shut my brain off enough to fall asleep and as soon as I do, DS is crying for me. UGH!
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